Friday, August 30, 2013

Fluffy Thing Fridays - Boingy! Boingy! Boingy!

So last week a friend of mine sent me THIS:


As soon as the music started, I almost died laughing.  

It prompted a friend of mine to suggest doing a Fluffy Thing Friday dedicated to bouncy animals.

First, my brain went OMG TIGGER!  'Cause seriously, I'm a huge Winnie the Pooh fan.  Which made me google Baby Tigger and that where I found the cutest cartoon baby Tigger EVER!




But in the long run, there's really not THAT many animals that bounce!

But the one's that do?  So freakin' cute.



Look at that little face.


Can't have a bouncy list without a few Bunnies.


The little ears just kill me.


OK not necessarily "cute" but very pretty.




Cheers,

Ash

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Hey you! Yeah, you! The one driving the Midlife Crisis on Wheels....

I'm a bit of a car freak.  My uncle's a car freak.  One of my best friends is a car freak.  2 of my ex-boyfriends were car freaks.  My dad's a car freak, and I am my father's daughter.

So that means, typically, I notice nice cars when I encounter them on the road.

I also have a pretty good understanding on what attracts certain people to certain cars.

Ahem.  If Men Were Like Cars


So.  When I get cut off while driving on an essentially empty road while on my way to work at 6:30AM by a balding dickhead in a Corvette, a few things instantly go through my mind.

1. It's 6:30 in the morning and the roads are empty.  You're more than capable of passing me WITHOUT cutting me off.  Dick.
2. What's the fucking hurry?  It's  6:30 IN THE MORNING!! Dick.
3.  You're a dick.

I get it.  You're older, you can now afford the sports car that you couldn't afford when you were 25.  You're also clinging to the youth that passed you by a few years ago.  I get it. And I notice you.   Problem is, like a girl wearing too tight clothing, or a too short skirt, I'm noticing you for the wrong reasons.  Didn't your mom ever teach you that not all attention is good attention?

Your intent was probably to have people notice how big your penis is, I mean how fast and expensive your car is.  And honestly, if you drive a nice car people are going to notice it.  But do you know why I noticed you?  Because you're being a dick.  You're rude, impatient and potentially a reckless driver as well.  And like the girl in the miniskirt, it means I notice you, but you're not worth a second thought.  Pretty to look at but that's about it.

So do the world a favor.  Make me notice you for the right reasons.   By all means, drive a nice car.  Because it's a NICE CAR.  But don't make me remember you because you're the dick who cut me off.  Being an dick isn't sexy.

Cheers,

Ash






















p.s. Bit of a late disclaimer but I know that some women deal with a midlife crisis as well.  Cougars.  'Nuff said.

Monday, August 26, 2013

Things I Learned Watching The Amazing Race

I've mentioned it in the past, but let me remind you.   I'm sooooooooooo not a TV person.

I will pick a book over TV every single time.

Recently though with all this fire and apartment hunting bullshit, added onto the commute from hell and stress at work, I find I've been watching a bit of TV.  If like 2 hours a week counts as a bit.


One of those hours has recently been The Amazing Race Canada.

Now, I typically LOATHE reality TV, but I've watched the US version of The Amazing Race in the past because I'm a travel junkie and I love seeing some of the cool places they send contestants.  I've never watched a full season because typically the backstabbing and bullshit pisses me off.

Not to say that the same thing isn't true for the Canadian version.   I mean there are contestants on the show that I would seriously consider smacking the shit out of.

Despite the bullshit, I've actually learned a few key things.
Lake Louise, Alberta

1. My Country Rocks.  I mean seriously.  We have some gorgeous shit in this country.  I need to travel more within my own boarders.  'Cause really, who knew that Yellowknife was the best place in the world to view the Northern Lights. 

2. Never enter a competition with romantic partner (we're talking boyfriend or husband).  Why?  Because competition sometimes brings out the worst in people.  With something like this, you're under stress, you're tired and if one partner is stronger than the other not only do you have to deal with getting yourself through the challenges but you have to try and drag another person along with you.  And as we've seen, that other person may be stupid, wimpy or just plain annoying. 

Yellowknife, Northwest Territories
3. You're stronger than you think.  I mean for those of you who don't watch the show (or for my lovely Americans), there is a contestant with Parkinson's, and a contestant that has 2 prosthetic legs.  This is a physical game.  If they can do it.  ANYONE can do it.

4. People can be pretty shitty.  One of the reasons why I don't watch reality TV is because things like Big Brother, The Bachelor and Honey Boo Boo make me lose faith in humanity.  I'm not really a competitive person so seeing how shitty people can be to each other in a game of this scale makes me kinda sad.  I'm one of those people that thinks the best man should always win, not the most manipulative. 

So what do you think.  Have you caught the Canadian version?  Have you watched the original?

Would you ever participate in something this crazy?  I'm fine with most of the challenges but I'm so not cool with heights so some of this stuff would be a big no-no for me.

Cheers,

Ash

Friday, August 23, 2013

Fluffy Thing Fridays - Foxy Foxes!

I Loooooove foxes.  They're pretty and yet totally badass.  I mean the fox in "The Little Prince" was awesome.

The inspiration for this week's theme came from the fact that I had to search for a high resolution Mozilla Firefox logo for a presentation I was working on.

I came across a few hilarious images of real Foxes with Firefox related jokes.

But before we get to those....

So beautiful and floofy. 


Happy Fox!


Friendly Fox!


The result from the above up close photo session. 


Floofy White Arctic Fox


Now for some non-apologetic Firefox jokes.





Probably my favorite one....


For my non-Canadians, the cup the fox is sniffing is from Tim Hortons
a very popluar Coffee shop here in Canada.

Cheers,

Ash



Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Oh The Humanity!

Occasionally I get very depressed about the state of Humanity.  I mean, I take public transit in a major city.  If that doesn't remind you how shitty human beings can be I don't know what will.

I get that everyone has varying concepts of what is polite or socially acceptable.  Everyone has a different work ethic or code of conduct that they live by and what their individual definition of respect is.

Is it the end of the world that one of my co-workers leaves early or comes in late whenever the boss isn't around?  No.  But it's sneaky and disrespectful of their boss and their co-workers who put in their full 9-5.

Is it a crime to not give an elderly lady or a pregnant woman your seat on the train?  No, but I'm guessing your momma taught you better.

Every once in a while, you see something that lifts your opinion of humanity.

But every once in a while, you see something that makes you feel so disgusted in people that you don't quite know how to deal with it.

Now I don't typically talk about news and current events but I came across something yesterday that horrified me.

It's been on all the news stations here and was even featured on Buzzfeed, that a Canadian woman received a hate letter from one of her "neighbors" regarding her autistic Grandson

Check out the article and read the letter at the end.

Are you horrified?

I don't even understand how someone could think those things let alone actually say that to another human being.  And this woman is a mother?  Are you kidding me?  I honestly can't comprehend how someone could be that shitty of a person.  And what is she teaching her children?  That people that are different will never be loved and should be EUTHANIZED?!?!?!?! Seriously!?!?!?  I can't even express how horrified I was when I read the full letter.  I can't even imagine how the parents feel. 

I honestly hope the police are able to track this chick down.  They're looking into if it's actually illegal but in my opinion, it should set a new precedent for harassment.  If karma exists, the contents of this letter would at minimum result in this woman's children being taken away from her because someone like that has no business raising children.

Cheers,

Ash

For Discussion:

1. Would you legally consider a letter like this harassment?

2. What do you think should be done to this author? (Don't say drag her ass down the street and lynch the bitch...I know it's tempting but let's stick within the boundaries of the law.)



Monday, August 19, 2013

Can't Tell if it's Allergies, or my Immune System Just Hates me. Maybe Both.

I'm pretty sure that my immune system hates me but I'll give it the benefit of the doubt.

Some people have spring time allergies.  The smell of freshly cut grass and pollen are enough to send them into a drippy sneezy fit.

I on the other hand suffer from allergies later in the summer and early fall.   Not to say that the spring doesn't impact me but I find the later season much harder to deal with.

This biggest offender right now is Ragweed.  It sucks.  It sucks, because I feel like my head weights a thousand pounds and is stuffed with cotton wool.   The allergy meds make me feel slow and fuzzy which is not cool when at work.  To top it off, I'm pretty sure I've had a head cold for the past month.

Why do I think this?

Because even on allergy meds I'm still stuffed up, sneezy and coughy.  I'm like an infectious Dwarf.  I dub myself Sniffly.  The long lost 8th Dwarf that took off because she got sick of cleaning up after the other 7 slobs.  Me bailing is why Snow White had to clean-up so much crap before she could take a nap.  Because 7 men living in one house and not a single one of them knows how to was a dish.  Fuck that shit. 

The solution to my symptoms would to take an over the counter cold medication like Day-Quil or something.  But my body doesn't like me taking multiple drugs so I'm hesitant to blend a cold medication with an antihistamine.  I do have a 3 hour a day commute to deal with after all and getting wonky behind the wheel wouldn't be cool.

The result?

My allergies are taken care of but I'm still stuffed up with a cold.  I could ditch the allergy meds and take cold meds instead but then I'd probably still be sniffly and add on itchy just for shits and giggles.

Either way, the result wouldn't be me breathing through both nostrils or sleeping through the night.

Annnnnnnnnnnd we're right back to my original assumption that my immune system simply hates me.

Thanks immune system.  You suck.

Cheers,

Ash

Anyone have some wisdom or miracle cure for me?  I'm taking a bunch of Vitamin C and some natural remedies to help deal with the cold but it's not going away.  It's not getting worse but it's not going away either.

Friday, August 16, 2013

Fluffy Thing Fridays - No, that's MY bed!

Anyone who has kids or pets knows that not only do you have no privacy, but you also randomly have to give up your bed to something smaller and cuter than you are.

My cat is the master of taking over the warm spot in bed, the second you get up to go to the bathroom.

He's like a little stealthy bed Ninja.


He also has NO SHAME about stealing your bed.

Much like these cats, that have no shame in stealing their furry roommate's bed.

Poor dogs don't have a chance.











What I love about all of these pictures is that the dogs just accept the smaller bed.

Like, "Oh ok, that's the one you like? I don't really fit in this little bed but as long as you're comfortable."

But anyone who has a cat, KNOWS that they take up much more room than they need.

It's their perogative.



Cheers,

Ash

This Purina commercial spawned this post.  Check it out to see dog bed stealing in action.

Friday, August 9, 2013

Fluffy Thing Fridays - Help! I'm Stuck!

I took another impromptu break last week.  I was off work and between running around taking my mom to various appointments and seeing a few apartments I had a pretty hectic "vacation".  Add to that I got sick pretty much as soon as I walked out of the office which isn't THAT surprising.

Oh well.

But I'm back!  Still on an apartment hunt but found a few places that should be good, just waiting to get an appointment to see one.

The whole process of apartment hunting has made me feel like I'm stuck.  You know that, help I've fallen but I can't get up, kinda feeling?  Yeah, that.

So to go with that flow, here are a few cute pics of animals that are literally STUCK.  'Cause let's face it.  Animals tend to try and go where they don't belong.





 I don't even know HOW this would happen. 
 

Look at that face.



Awwwwww.  


 

 This is so something my cat would do. 
 


Fingers crossed that this next apartment is the LAST one I have to go see, because honestly, if I see one more shitty apartment I'm going to cry.

Cheers,

Ash