Friday, March 16, 2012

Pardon me, do you often get bits of toilet paper stuck to your butt?

So I work in the Market Research field and commonly get to hear about new products or concepts.  Some of it is really cool and you think, "Wow, I wish they made that."

Other times it's a little nutty.

Because I have a pretty good understanding of how new products get on the market, every once in a while I see something and I have to stop dead in my tracks because the fact that it made it past the concept stage just stupefies me.

Case in point.  Charmin Extra Strong Toilet Paper.

OK, so it's yet another type of toilet paper that provides us yet another option in an already saturated market.  That's not the problem.  The problem is that Charmin Extra Strong Toilet Paper has been marketed as a solution to the pesky problem of having little bits of TP stuck to your ass.

Really? 

You know the one I'm talking about.  With the little bear who wipes his bum and shockingly, his old TP leavs little bits of fluff on his furry little behind and the momma bear is suitably horrified.



I mean is this a legitimate problem?  I'm curious.  Do people commonly get toilet paper stuck to their butts?

For a moment, imagine the following:

You're sitting in a focus group, and the moderator asks everyone, "What do you look for when purchasing toilet paper?"

I'm sure someone is going to say, softness, someone else is going to say they look to see if it's made out of recycled materials and finally someone is going to say "Well I wish it didn't get stuck to my butt all the time!"

Pardon me?

Either that happened or somewhere an advertising exec decided it would be cute to show a cartoon baby bear with bits of toilet paper stuck to his furry bum in the commercial.

Do you ever see a product and just think to yourself, "What the hell were they thinking?"

The sad thing is the companies take months and spend thousands upon thousands of dollars on product innovation every year.  Sometimes the result is a really cool new thing.  Other times.....not so much.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Shit my dad says.....

Ok so this is my version of "Shit my Dad Says"

The following was an actual conversation that took place after seeing the trailer for the new John Carter film:

Dad: What's with this John Carter shit?

Me: What shit? They are very popular books and Taylor Kitsch is kinda hot.

Dad: What is it, like a tribute to Arnold?

Me: What?

Dad: You know. Like "Terminator the Conan The Barbarian Years"

Me: Dad, thats John Connor, not Carter.

Dad: Same shit.

Me: No it's not the same at all. John Connor was the leader of the resistance against the Terminators developed by Skynet. John Carter was a Civil-War Captain that mysteriously got projected to Mars, marries a martian Princess and saves the planet.

Dad: So no robots in that one?

Me: No robots. Only aliens and funky creatures.

Dad: That's stupid.

Me: It's not stupid, it's just Science Fiction. It's no more stupid than intelligent robots taking over the world and destroying humanity.

Dad: But at least that could actually happen. I mean we've been waiting for that shit to happen since the '60s. You've seen 2001: A Space Odyssey. What about The Matrix?

Me: How come you can remember 2001: A Space Odyssey, which you haven't seen in 30 years and The Matrix, which I know you slept through and yet not be able to tell the difference between the preview you just saw and Terminator which you own both on VHS and DVD?

Dad: How do you know about all this crap anyway? Why do you have to be such a smart-ass?

Thus endeth the conversation. Apparently I am both a book nerd and a smart-ass. That and my father is convinced the Chinese are making robots that will take over the world because of a special he saw on Daily Planet.

Oy!

Ash